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Preparing Youth for Peer Pressure
From U.S. Dept of Health and Human Services
Peer pressure—it’s more than just a phase that young people go
through. Whether it leads to pink hair or body piercing, peer
pressure is a powerful reality and many adults do not realize
its effects. It can be a negative force in the lives of children
and adolescents, often resulting in their experimentation with
tobacco, alcohol, and illegal drugs.
Parents often believe that their children do not value their
opinions. In reality, studies suggest that parents have
tremendous influence over their children, especially teenagers.
No matter the age of their children, parents and caregivers
should never feel helpless about countering the negative effects
of peer pressure. Here’s what parents and caregivers can do:
- Teach young people how to refuse offers for cigarettes,
alcohol and drugs. Making children comfortable with what they
can say goes a long way. For instance, shy children and
adolescents might be more comfortable saying, “no thanks,” or “I
have to go,” while those who are more outgoing might saying
something like, “forget it!” or “no way!” No matter what
approach parents choose, it is important for them to role-play
peer-pressure situations with their children.
- Talk to young people about how to avoid undesirable situations
or people who break the rules. Children and adolescents who are
not in situations where they feel pressure to do negative
actions are far less likely to do them. Likewise, those who
choose friends who do not smoke, drink, use drugs, steal, and
lie to their parents are far less likely to do these things as
well.
- Remind children that there is strength in numbers. When young
people can anticipate stressful peer pressure situations, it
might be helpful if they bring friends for support.
- Let young people know that it is okay to seek an adult’s
advice. While it would be ideal if children sought the advice of
their parents, other trusted adults can usually help them avoid
most difficult situations, such as offers to smoke, drink, or
use drugs.
- Nurture strong self-esteem. Strong self-esteem helps children
and adolescents make decisions and follow them, even if their
friends do not think some choices are “cool.” Some ways parents
can do this include being generous with praise, teaching
children how to perceive themselves in positive ways, and
avoiding criticism of children that takes the form of ridicule
or shame.
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