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Todays Joke
      Today's Joke: Trini in Toronto

October 8th -

We have arrived in Canada!!!. Finally!! This marks a new chapter in our lives. It's very nice here. It's a little cool, but who needs HOT weather? This is perfect: Not too hot, not too cold.

October 15th -

It is getting a little cooler, but we are adjusting. We bought some sweaters today and went for a short walk. Loving Toronto!!!. This is what life is about!!!

October 30th -

The weather is definitely cooler now. We taped all the windows shut, so cold air cannot creep in. Outside may be cold, but it feels like Port-of-Spain in this house.

November 11th -

The news reports say snow is on the way ... we cannot wait!!! We have never seen snow and it should be pretty exciting to see it for the first time.

November 14th -

It started snowing. The first of the season and the first real snow we have ever seen. The wife cooked Pelau and we sat by the window watching soft flakes drift down, clinging to the trees and covering the ground. Could never do anyting like this in Trinidad A BEAUTIFUL SIGHT!!!

November 15th -

We woke to a lovely blanket of crystal white snow covering the landscape. What a FANTASTIC sight! Every tree and shrub was covered like a beautiful white mantle. I shoveled snow for the first time and loved it. I did both our driveway and the sidewalk. Later, the city snow plough came along and accidentally covered up our driveway with compacted snow from the street. The driver smiled and waved and I waved back and shoveled again, Torontonians are so friendly!!!

November 18th -

It snowed an additional twelve inches last night and the temperature has dropped to around four degrees. The cold weather is not so bad. We can take this. Not at all as bad as we imagined. Several limbs on the trees and shrubs have snapped due to the weight of the snow. I shoveled our driveway again. Shortly afterwards the snow plough came by and did his trick again. Much of the snow is brownish gray.

November 19th -

Warmed up enough during the day to create some slush, which soon became ice again. Bought snow tires for both cars. I slipped and fell on my backside in the driveway, paid $130 for the chiropractor, but fortunately, nothing was broken. More snow and ice expected.

November 20th -

Still cold. Sold my wife's car and bought a 4 X 4 in order to get to work.

November 21st. -

On my way to work, the 4 X 4 skidded into the guardrail and did considerable damage to the right fender. We had another
15 inches of white shit last night. The vehicle have salt and shit all over it. More shoveling in store for me today! De dam snow plough man did he job again. Watch me an' him!

November 22nd -

Yuh believe dis? De first heating bill just come! How de hell it come up to so much???

November 30th -

Its two frigging degrees outside! an' more snow on de way. Every dam tree in de yard geh damage up. An' to crown it off, de power went out mos ah the night. We try to keep from freezing to death wid candles an' kerosene heater, but de heater tip over an' nearly bun dung de kiss-meh-ass house. Ah manage to put out de flames, but end up wid second degree burns on meh hans. Ah nearly bun off meh eyebrow an' eyelash. Den de car slide on de white shit again! on the way to de hospital, an' we had to write it off.

December 5th -

Look at meh crosses! Dis snow ain't plan to stop soon. De ting comin'down and down as if it go never stop!!What de arse is this?!!! Ah had to put on all meh clothes dat ah own just to go out to meh mailbox. This is real shit! If ah ever catch the prick dat drive dat snow plough, ah tell yuh, ah go cross one lash in he arse. He go bawl like ten Tarzan when he get it. Ah really tink he does hide round de corner and wait 'til ah finish shoveling, den come down the street fas, fas, an' cover up we driveway again. Boy, ah tell yuh!!!

December 10th -

De power still off, de toilet freeze up. Some part ah de roof look like it ready to cave in.

December 15th -

Another mudder arse eleven more inches ah snow an' ice! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! God know dis aint right. Ah put ah hole in de snow plough with me pick-ax but the driver get away by the skin of he teeth. If he feel he go be so lucky next time, he lie!!!

December 16 -

De wife take off and lef me,

December 18 --

De car cyar start an' ah tink ah goin' snow-blind. Ah cyar feel me toes an' ah din see de sun fuh weeks ! ! ! ! ! An' guess whuh? De weatherman predict more snow ! ! ! ! Yuh believe dat?!!! An' de win-chill is 30 friggin degrees below zero! !

December 22 -

Dis TRINI moving back home TODAY before dis God forsaken, kiss-meh-ass place done kill mih arse an finish mash up mih family!!!! If ah ketch a flight, at least a could reach Port-of-Spain fuh Christmas and some good liquors an Parang. Toronto could haul dey ass!


Supplied By: F. Nelson




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